Research from the Journal of Sexual Archives surveyed 481 heterosexual females, all sexually active but not in serious relationships. Their reasons for faking it are;
- “Altrustic Deciet” – to protect the man’s feelings
- Fear and insecurity – wanting the sex to be a positive experience
- Faking it to end the session
- Fake it to make it
“Elevated arousal” is the technical term for faking an orgasm to make yourself feel more turned on, and this was certainly the most interesting survey result. It’s based on the theory that if you act out the thing you want to happen, sometimes it will.
Kind of like when athletes in training visualise what they want to achieve.
Women in this particular study said if they pretended to orgasm, their partner got more excited, which got them more excited. By re-enacting the lead up to the real thing – breathing faster, noise, the whole show – you might just be able to push yourself over the threshold.
But it is best not to use the “fake it til you make it” technique at the beginning of a relationship, unless you explain what you are doing. Reason being, how will your partner ever learn what is actually going to give you an orgasm if they think they’re doing it already? There is nothing wrong with constructive feedback and communication is key to good sex.
Tracey Cox is a renowned international sex and relationships expert. Her supersex range of sex toys and lubricants is exclusively available at Lovehoney.