Having shot to fame as a child star, Demi Lovato became the poster-child for young teens around the world, looking up to the singer with equal parts admiration and awe. From her style to her acting chops and singer prowess, the world was Lovato’s domain but at an age where the singer still lacked great autonomy, she was forced to navigate the intense scrutiny of the public gaze alone.
The years that followed were a heartbreaking story of drug addiction and mental health struggles. We demand so much of the artists we love, yet often fail to recognise that they are human after all. Now, in a trailer for her upcoming documentary set to land on YouTube, titled Dancing With The Devil, Lovato shares just how dark things really got for her. She discusses everything from her 2018 drug overdose to being raped by a fellow actor when she was a teenager to later being raped by her drug dealer.
Since her drug overdose, Lovato has been open about her struggles with addiction. In March 2018, the singer/songwriter celebrated six years of sobriety during a performance at Barclays Centre in Brooklyn, New York. But in a trailer for the new documentary, it’s revealed that just one month later Lovato relapsed. “I remember thinking to myself, I don’t even know why I’m sober anymore. I’m so miserable. I picked up a bottle of red wine that night. It wasn’t even 30 minutes before I called someone that I knew had drugs on them,” she said. “I’m surprised that I didn’t OD that night.”
She recounted bumping into her previous drug dealer at an event who had a “duffle bag” of drugs. “I just went to town. I went on a shopping spree. That night, I did drugs that I had never done before,” said the singer. “I had never done meth before, I tried meth. I mixed it with Molly, with coke, weed, alcohol, OxyContin. That alone should have killed me.”
Lovato goes on to describe how she suffered three strokes and a heart attack and was seen told by her doctor that she had only 10 minutes to live, before ultimately recovering. She suffered from pneumonia and multiple-organ failure. She has struggled to remain sober, saying in the interview, “Telling myself that I can never have a drink or smoke marijuana, I feel like that’s setting myself up for failure because I am such a black and white thinker. I had it drilled into my head for so many years that one drink was equivalent to a crack pipe.” She added, “I don’t want people to hear that and think they can just go out and try having a drink or smoking a joint. It isn’t for everybody. Recovery isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution. You shouldn’t be forced to be sober if you’re not ready. You shouldn’t get sober for other people.”
Dancing With The Devil by Demi Lovato premieres on YouTube on 24 March, 2021.