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Brene Brown Says The 80/20 Rule Is Essential For A Successful Relationship

It makes total sense. - by Lauren Williamson
  • 13 Feb 2020

Most of us are familiar with the "80/20 rule" in terms of moderating our eating, but renowned researcher Brene Brown applies it in a completely different way to relationships and it could change yours for the better. 

Planning on taking the next step with your partner? You need to watch this...

Firstly, if you're not familiar with Brown we recommend firing up Netflix and watching her documentary Call To Courage immediately. It's an extension of her 2010 TEDx talk on the power of vulnerability that's still one of the most watched TED Talks ever, with more than 45 million views.

In a chat with Tim Ferris on his podcast, the 45-year-old explains how the 80/20 "hack" has helped maintain her marriage for the last 25 years – the hardest thing she's ever done.

“Everyone says marriage should be 50/50; it’s the biggest crock of bull sh** I’ve ever heard," she says. "It’s never 50/50—ever.”

RELATED: Michelle Obama Just Shared The Most Profound Relationship Advice

Instead of the unrealistic expectation to match each other's energy, kindness, investment and patience, the pair are just brutally honest about where they're at on a day-to-day basis and will do their best to make up for one another.

If one is 20, the other puts in 80. 

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42.4k likes - View Post on Instagram
Sunset on a boat in the gulf with Steve listening to @chrisstapleton and @hayescarll = my happy place.

"Marriage isn’t something that’s 50/50; a partnership works when you can carry their 20 per cent, and they can carry your 20 per cent, and when you both just have 20 percent, you figure out a plan," she says.

During the times when they're less than 100 combined, they sit down together and work out a plan of kindness towards each other. This often means making life easier for each other by ordering takeaway, hiring the house keeper for an extra day and cancelling unnecessary plans, for example.

Genius. 

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Lauren Williamson
Lauren Williamson
Lauren Williamson is the Digital Content Manager for Women's Health and Men's Health. She's an experienced journalist, editor and social media fiend who's well versed in reporting on everything from food trends to fitness, health news to haircare. She has a double degree in Journalism and Political Science.

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